Recently, Meghan and I were shopping at Target. As we approached the peanut butter area (I really like PB), I noticed two older women perusing the jams and jellies. Entertaining myself, I imagined that these ladies were, in fact, British ladies selecting which jams would be choice to enhance Tea Time. I giggled inside at the thought.
After selected my Skippy SuperChunk (sans Trans Fats) , Meghan and I started to look at the look at the jellies too. Politely, the ladies moved slightly to the side, allowing room for us as well. Since the whole rest of the isle was devoid of people, I said "This is quite the hot spot, eh?!" The younger of the ladies (40s) said "Yes it is."
Now when she said this, in my mind, it even sounded slightly English. "Did I detect an accent?" I asked. To my surprise, she said "yes. WE'RE FROM ENGLAND" [Note: they did not actually yell this, the capitals are intended to give it emphasis representing the surprise I felt]
Then I just got all stupid. I said things like "So you crossed the pond to get some jams and jellies?" and "I really think you sound great" and "Boy, I'm almost, like, starstruck here" Stupid things like that.
As we chatted we found out the mom, er, mum, was visiting from England and the daughter has lived in Utah for 17 years (Yet still maintains a delightfully thick accent!)
Very nice ladies.
I do, however, think they were slightly creeped out by my intense interest in their accents. I couldn't help but think this as I noticed them s l o w l y b a c k i n g a w a y from me as I was talking to them.
I need to expand my horizons so I'm not such a wanker.
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4 comments:
I'm completely freaked out by your picture. Eerie. Creepie. Very well photoshopped, and yet just "not right."
Now, about the English ladies...er, lady...that sounds like something I'd do. I'm intrigued by other people's accents, but I always take it one step further and start talking like them without realizing it. Then they think I'm making fun, I start making stupid jokes to cover...it's a disaster. Which kind of sounds like what YOU created! Funny...and uncomfortable...
Whatever, Matt, you're too adorable...and hot...for them to really have been weirded out. They probably went home and blogged about the awesome guy and his cute girlfriend who befriended them in the grocery store.
No no, babe in boysland, He really does need to expand his horizons. As long as I've known you, you have had a limited horizons, so limited in fact that they went straight up and down, or VERizons. (as they are vertical) So JOLLY GOOD SHOW OL' CHAP at growing as a human in a human society.
btw: That was me in the peanut butter isle and I was just wearing a dress not talking with an accent.
I like how you linked "wanker". I'm all about the hidden or not so hidden subtext links in the blog world. They are underrated. Hey Matt now that my blog isn't as self-indulgent you should return to the loving arms of Jeff Blogdom.
PS. What does the scribble on your banner meaneth?
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